Nick and I just completed our two-day birthing class. We saw a LOT of pictures like this one (which is what Elise looks like now at 35 weeks). A few other tidbits:- Nick actually watched a birthing video and did not pass out. I'm feeling optimistic about him remaining conscious during labor and delivery.
- Apparently overalls used to be very common and completely unflattering maternity wear.
- The couple in the video wanted to "examine the placenta" after delivery. This is absolutely not happening in our situation. EW.
- I'm pretty sure our kid will be way less weird than the couple with the "Ride or Die" tattoos that sat across from us.
- "Ride or Die" couple laid down and spooned during a couple short videos.
- "Ride or Die" husband/boyfriend (not sure) asked if he could use vegetable oil to massage the perineum. ***
- There were a lot of acronyms used. One was T.A.C.O. We stopped at Taco Bell on our way home. I of course can't eat much past 9pm or I will have to sleep sitting up - but I did have some bites of Nicks and that crap is SO GOOD.
- When asked the first thing we thought of when we thought of labor, I said "epidural". The guy next to me said "miracle". Word association FAIL.
I completely forgot one of the funniest things "Ride or Die" said:
Instructor: Remember that labor pain is the only kind of purposeful pain.
Ride or Die: But what if you're into freaky stuff like candle wax?
Instuctor: Uh....
Ride or Die: Yeah, that could serve a purpose if you're into that stuff.
Ride or Die: But what if you're into freaky stuff like candle wax?
Instuctor: Uh....
Ride or Die: Yeah, that could serve a purpose if you're into that stuff.
*** If you do not know what this is - Google it. I'm not putting that business up on here. Gross. Although I'm warning you it could be graphic.
I hope those people know they don't let you take babies home on a Harley!!!
ReplyDeleteoh, yeah! we didn't exactly make friends at our birth class. lots of interesting people... our class always had the BEST desserts to snack on! that's the ONE thing i'll miss about not taking it again. the epidural you speak of - BEST THING EVA! seriously.
ReplyDeletehope you know this is liz and not sean. he doesn't comment on any blog and if he did, on this one in particular, it would be creepy.
ReplyDeleteWay to go Nick!!!
ReplyDeleteWow, sounds like you had crazier people in your classes than we did. Oh, and I'd forgotten all about the perineum and those stupid pictures/videos until now, thanks for that.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm shocked that Nick did not pass out.
My mom and I were laughing so hard at these (especially the Ride and Die perineum part) that I couldn't finish reading it to her and almost needed a potty break.
ReplyDeleteThose are seriously so funny. The only kind of funny thing from my labor class was that I sat there drinking a Diet Coke while everyone else gave me the stink eye for drinking caffeine. But I was so thirsty, it was baby #2, and peer pressure has never gotten to me so I didn't care in the least!
And, I'm with Liz: Team Epidural.
Maybe if we could have had an epidural back in the day, I wouldn't have kept swearing at John and telling him to "STOP STARING AT ME!" during contractions.
ReplyDeleteRach - did you get your santa giggles at that weird couple?!
Oopsy - that last comment was from me.
ReplyDeletehahahaha this is a hilarious post!!! People are so weird!!!
ReplyDeleteGlad you feel confident in Nick not passing out, that would not be helpful
I can't believe you are so close to the end!!!!!!! I cannot wait to see Miss Elise!
I can't wait to google the candle wax thing... I have no idea what that could mean... yikes
ReplyDeleteStacy - you may not want to Google that...I think it's kind of a pervy thing. They were that weird. I think Ricky Martin did it in a video once.
ReplyDeleteHi Rachel,
ReplyDeleteThis is Cara, Jayne's sis-in-law...I linked to your blog through hers. Congrats on your soon-to-be-fam! I just had to comment that I am now on my 3rd pregnancy (1st one arrived in 2004), and I am embarrassed to say that I did in fact have a pair of maternity overalls that I wore quite frequently! Thankfully, I did not wear them with the other two...